There was a time in my life when I had yet to experience really anything sexual. Hard to believe... but we were all there at one point.
It wasn't until I was about thirteen that I had my first real hook up. I mean, I'd played 'doctor' and played with a few vaginas, but nothing really beyond that.
My brother met a California girl at a youth conference, and invited her to come visit the family for a week a few months later.
She was a surfer girl. With a great body.
And she was nineteen.
The tension between us was pretty serious, and after fooling around a bit we both ended up naked in my room and she gave me my first blow job. Even back then, I had pretty good control, and never 'came to fruition'.
In fact, I had never EVER cum before.
I hadn't really thought about it before then. But, when she asked me how often I jacked off to have that kind of control, I didn't know what to say. I just shrugged my shoulders.
Was it weird that at thirteen I hadn't ever jacked off yet?
I decided that I wanted to have a serious answer the next time a hot girl asked me that. Especially a hot girl who was naked on top of me who asked me that.
So the next night, I was laying in bed, and decided that it was the night.
I was going to lose my masturbation virginity.
Since I hadn't done it before, when I started stroking, and as it started to feel awesome, I started also gripping my cock in my hand like a fucking vice.
It took me a few minutes, but when I came my ears were ringing, and I could barely breathe.
It was epic.
I let go of my penis and noticed for the first time that I had been gripping it pretty hard. I didn't really think anything of it, though.
Men do this all the time, right? Any side effects must be worth it.
I cleaned myself up and passed out.
The next day I was startled awake when I rolled over because it felt like someone had punched me in the urethra. I grabbed my package and nearly screamed in agony.
I could barely walk to the washroom to see what was going on.
When I pulled off my boxers, I nearly lost my shit.
My cock was about three times the size in diameter as normal. Subcutaneous fluid filled what I can only describe as 'cock rolls'. My cock had been transformed into the Michelin man overnight, and was dripping clear fluid from between the cracks of swollen skin.
Touching any part of it caused a severe burning sensation.
I started to tear up. This couldn't really be happening. How could people deal with this on a regular basis? Why would anybody wish this upon themselves?
HOW EXACTLY WAS I SUPPOSED TO ASK SOMEONE FOR HELP?
I walked funny for three days. And I had to learn how to pee free form, no hands... for over a week.
I didn't jack off again for nearly a year after that.
But, remembering how good it felt, of course decided to try it again. I used a super light touch, and even though it took longer to achieve, still felt awesome. And my penis looked normal the next day.
My penis and I have had a pretty solid relationship ever since.
Friday, 27 July 2012
Thursday, 19 July 2012
Repercussions
I've been to Vegas a couple of times. The first time I was there, I set the bar pretty high.
I really had no idea what to expect.
My buddy Jess and I made an itinerary to make sure we hit all the night clubs and strip clubs we could in our short stay.
We didn't really care about gambling, we came to Vegas to see some nipples.
Originally, we had planned on walking or taking the monorail to get places on the strip. But, since we were retarded and planned our trip at the end of August, we ended up taking cabs.
Walking during a summer month in Vegas was out of the question. At one point early on, we decided to walk from Belagio to Treasure Island. We got about 400 yards before my ball sweat was dripping down my legs. I could feel my ass cheeks gliding across each other every time I took another step. I had a small river-o'-sweat emerging at my neck which flowed all the way down my spine.
The monorail sounds great, and looks like it's close to the strip on a map.
Incorrect.
Every block on the strip is huge. Walking from the monorail station to Las Vegas Blvd once again induced dripping ball sack.
We arrived close to midnight the first night, and decided not to waste the night and headed to a fully nude strip club. It was an adult store with dildos and DVDs with a small curtain that lead to the back room. The bouncers looked like something out of a 80s porno. Slicked back hair, thick gold sunglasses, and gold chains with thick chest hair coming out of floral patterned shirts.
They let us through to the back room. After a narrow hallway with two small private rooms, it opened up again and had an area with a stage and some space with a bunch of seating.
I asked for a beer, and the girl behind the counter snarled at me.
"We're a fully nude club. No alcohol."
It took a second to register. I was unaware of this rule. Legal drinking age in Nevada is 21, legal stripping age is 18. So all the 18-20 year olds were stripping at the fully nude clubs, but no alcohol was allowed.
'Merica, right?
I ordered a cola and went and sat on sniffer's row with Jess. We were the only customers.
We put our stack of ones down beside us, and mostly chatted with each other, because the stage show wasn't great. One of the girls slid down the pole too quickly and landed on her tailbone. She was overweight and performed like it was her first time out of the house.
Jess and I looked at each other with disbelief, just as she swiped all of Jess's stack and plopped the bills on the stage.
She looked at me and gestured towards the bouncers. "Taking money off the stage will get you kicked out."
What. The. Flying. Fuck.
I moved my stack farther away from her and Jess went to the 'bar' to grab more bills.
"Well, you're not getting any of mine. You might as well just get off the stage."
She called me an asshole and grabbed her stuff.
The next girl was much cuter, but was still clearly an amateur. We convinced her to give us a free private show and took pictures of her getting naked and making out with me.
All in all we'd spent about $25. I guess you get what you pay for, I was pretty disappointed. I'd heard so much about the Vegas strip clubs, and this first one was just not good.
The second night we went to Badda Bing. I made a call to get the free limo service to the club.
Lap dances here were $10. I nearly shit myself. I thought I was in heaven.
Until I had a stage five clinger offering me a dance.
She was probably in her forties, wearing a sheer black outfit that showed off her baby belly and c-section scar. Bottle blonde hair with inch long roots showing, and floppy arm and leg skin like she had recently lost significant weight.
She sat on my lap and whispered in my ear. I tried to ignore her, but it just encouraged her to try harder.
I nearly offered her $10 just to leave me alone, but figured I'd get the lap dance out of it, anyway. So I caved.
I nearly fell asleep. She was boring as hell.
The song finally finished and she kissed me on the head as she was putting her too-snug outfit back on.
By this point, Jess had found the only two other girls working that night and was sitting on a couch with them talking about how generous I must be to give that woman money.
These two weren't bad, so I sat down with them.
Since we were the only people there... again (don't go to Vegas on a Wednesday)... they had no reason to leave, so they just sat with us and chatted for a long time.
The one next to me slowly made her way onto my lap and started making out with me. She told me she wanted to give me a free dance.
I accepted.
She started taking her clothes off, and I noticed for the first time how incredible her body was.
Technically, you're not allowed to touch the strippers in Vegas. I knew that, but I wanted to see how far I could push the rules. So as she was rubbing her tits over my mouth, I started licking and biting her nipples. She didn't tell me to stop. She put her hand on the back of my head and encouraged me to continue.
I let my hands wander over her and found her thong. I started playing with her through the panties, and she started grinding my hand. So I pulled them aside and started fingering her.
Right there on the couch.
In the middle of the strip club.
The song ended, but she didn't stop. We made out for probably another five minutes.
When she started putting her outfit back on, she told me she wanted to give me her number, but wasn't allowed to, and if I pulled out my phone for her, she'd get in trouble. I told her I had a good memory, so she told me her number, and I went to the washroom to punch it in. I sent a quick text to make sure I'd gotten it right, and waited a couple minutes before returning.
As I was walking back, she gave me a subtle thumbs up to let me know she'd gotten the text.
By the time we left there, it was around 6:00 am.
As soon as we walked out the door, I called Cousin and told her what happened. Her very first question was, "Did you wash your hands? I mean, that's pretty awesome, but you don't know where that vagina has been."
Jess and I talked to the bouncer and he called a cab for us. As we were waiting, the stripper I'd fingered came out of the side door clearly pissed about something. The bouncer asked her what was wrong and she threw her hands up in the air, "I just got fired! Those assholes just fired me!"
She got into her car, drove up to us and rolled down her window. I was expecting her to scream at me for breaking the rules.
Instead she said, "Call me. You're fun. I want to see you again before you leave town."
Fuck. Yah.
She texted me later and told me the whole story. The manager was pissed not only because she had broken the no touching rule, but also because the house is supposed to get a cut of whatever she makes. Since she hadn't charged me anything for the lap dances, they didn't make anything either. Their portion would have been like four bucks.
But, the next night we went to Spearmint Rhino, and I hadn't been black-balled, so I guess they were only mad at her. Which I was kind of relieved to discover.
You don't really want club owners mad at you in Vegas.
By the end of the trip, I was pretty good at turning down lap dances I didn't want. And getting strippers to come sit with me and make out with me without spending any money on them. I got one more stripper's number (she also had to sneak it to me), and had one introduce me to the bouncers as, "This guy is really cool, you guys make sure he gets home okay." Which turned out to be a free limo ride back to the hotel.
Spearmint and Sapphire were definitely awesome. My disappointment completely evaporated as soon as I walked into Spearmint. And Sapphire was even better.
Every time I go to Vegas now, I have to try to top the last time. So far, each time has been better. No more fired strippers, though.
But Vegas and me? We get along just fine.
I really had no idea what to expect.
My buddy Jess and I made an itinerary to make sure we hit all the night clubs and strip clubs we could in our short stay.
We didn't really care about gambling, we came to Vegas to see some nipples.
Originally, we had planned on walking or taking the monorail to get places on the strip. But, since we were retarded and planned our trip at the end of August, we ended up taking cabs.
Walking during a summer month in Vegas was out of the question. At one point early on, we decided to walk from Belagio to Treasure Island. We got about 400 yards before my ball sweat was dripping down my legs. I could feel my ass cheeks gliding across each other every time I took another step. I had a small river-o'-sweat emerging at my neck which flowed all the way down my spine.
The monorail sounds great, and looks like it's close to the strip on a map.
Incorrect.
Every block on the strip is huge. Walking from the monorail station to Las Vegas Blvd once again induced dripping ball sack.
We arrived close to midnight the first night, and decided not to waste the night and headed to a fully nude strip club. It was an adult store with dildos and DVDs with a small curtain that lead to the back room. The bouncers looked like something out of a 80s porno. Slicked back hair, thick gold sunglasses, and gold chains with thick chest hair coming out of floral patterned shirts.
They let us through to the back room. After a narrow hallway with two small private rooms, it opened up again and had an area with a stage and some space with a bunch of seating.
I asked for a beer, and the girl behind the counter snarled at me.
"We're a fully nude club. No alcohol."
It took a second to register. I was unaware of this rule. Legal drinking age in Nevada is 21, legal stripping age is 18. So all the 18-20 year olds were stripping at the fully nude clubs, but no alcohol was allowed.
'Merica, right?
I ordered a cola and went and sat on sniffer's row with Jess. We were the only customers.
We put our stack of ones down beside us, and mostly chatted with each other, because the stage show wasn't great. One of the girls slid down the pole too quickly and landed on her tailbone. She was overweight and performed like it was her first time out of the house.
Jess and I looked at each other with disbelief, just as she swiped all of Jess's stack and plopped the bills on the stage.
She looked at me and gestured towards the bouncers. "Taking money off the stage will get you kicked out."
What. The. Flying. Fuck.
I moved my stack farther away from her and Jess went to the 'bar' to grab more bills.
"Well, you're not getting any of mine. You might as well just get off the stage."
She called me an asshole and grabbed her stuff.
The next girl was much cuter, but was still clearly an amateur. We convinced her to give us a free private show and took pictures of her getting naked and making out with me.
All in all we'd spent about $25. I guess you get what you pay for, I was pretty disappointed. I'd heard so much about the Vegas strip clubs, and this first one was just not good.
The second night we went to Badda Bing. I made a call to get the free limo service to the club.
Lap dances here were $10. I nearly shit myself. I thought I was in heaven.
Until I had a stage five clinger offering me a dance.
She was probably in her forties, wearing a sheer black outfit that showed off her baby belly and c-section scar. Bottle blonde hair with inch long roots showing, and floppy arm and leg skin like she had recently lost significant weight.
She sat on my lap and whispered in my ear. I tried to ignore her, but it just encouraged her to try harder.
I nearly offered her $10 just to leave me alone, but figured I'd get the lap dance out of it, anyway. So I caved.
I nearly fell asleep. She was boring as hell.
The song finally finished and she kissed me on the head as she was putting her too-snug outfit back on.
By this point, Jess had found the only two other girls working that night and was sitting on a couch with them talking about how generous I must be to give that woman money.
These two weren't bad, so I sat down with them.
Since we were the only people there... again (don't go to Vegas on a Wednesday)... they had no reason to leave, so they just sat with us and chatted for a long time.
The one next to me slowly made her way onto my lap and started making out with me. She told me she wanted to give me a free dance.
I accepted.
She started taking her clothes off, and I noticed for the first time how incredible her body was.
Technically, you're not allowed to touch the strippers in Vegas. I knew that, but I wanted to see how far I could push the rules. So as she was rubbing her tits over my mouth, I started licking and biting her nipples. She didn't tell me to stop. She put her hand on the back of my head and encouraged me to continue.
I let my hands wander over her and found her thong. I started playing with her through the panties, and she started grinding my hand. So I pulled them aside and started fingering her.
Right there on the couch.
In the middle of the strip club.
The song ended, but she didn't stop. We made out for probably another five minutes.
When she started putting her outfit back on, she told me she wanted to give me her number, but wasn't allowed to, and if I pulled out my phone for her, she'd get in trouble. I told her I had a good memory, so she told me her number, and I went to the washroom to punch it in. I sent a quick text to make sure I'd gotten it right, and waited a couple minutes before returning.
As I was walking back, she gave me a subtle thumbs up to let me know she'd gotten the text.
By the time we left there, it was around 6:00 am.
As soon as we walked out the door, I called Cousin and told her what happened. Her very first question was, "Did you wash your hands? I mean, that's pretty awesome, but you don't know where that vagina has been."
Jess and I talked to the bouncer and he called a cab for us. As we were waiting, the stripper I'd fingered came out of the side door clearly pissed about something. The bouncer asked her what was wrong and she threw her hands up in the air, "I just got fired! Those assholes just fired me!"
She got into her car, drove up to us and rolled down her window. I was expecting her to scream at me for breaking the rules.
Instead she said, "Call me. You're fun. I want to see you again before you leave town."
Fuck. Yah.
She texted me later and told me the whole story. The manager was pissed not only because she had broken the no touching rule, but also because the house is supposed to get a cut of whatever she makes. Since she hadn't charged me anything for the lap dances, they didn't make anything either. Their portion would have been like four bucks.
But, the next night we went to Spearmint Rhino, and I hadn't been black-balled, so I guess they were only mad at her. Which I was kind of relieved to discover.
You don't really want club owners mad at you in Vegas.
By the end of the trip, I was pretty good at turning down lap dances I didn't want. And getting strippers to come sit with me and make out with me without spending any money on them. I got one more stripper's number (she also had to sneak it to me), and had one introduce me to the bouncers as, "This guy is really cool, you guys make sure he gets home okay." Which turned out to be a free limo ride back to the hotel.
Spearmint and Sapphire were definitely awesome. My disappointment completely evaporated as soon as I walked into Spearmint. And Sapphire was even better.
Every time I go to Vegas now, I have to try to top the last time. So far, each time has been better. No more fired strippers, though.
But Vegas and me? We get along just fine.
Thursday, 5 July 2012
Music festival
There was a wicked lineup this year.
I swear the thing gets better every time.
Here's a small selection of my text messages from the weekend:
Me: I'm at BOOOOOOOONSTOOOOOOOCK!!!!!!!
Cousin: :D how much beer?
I bought 2 26s of rum
Hahahahaah oh yeah
Yah buddy
I'm having sex tonight
:) I will probably not be. Considering the amount of rum I'll be consuming
Hahahaha, who'd Ruben bring?
His brother.
My shirts dirty.
I might have to share my tent with Ruben's brother
Not looking forward to that.
What??? Why?
He doesn't have his own tent. Fucker.
BYOTP
Bring your own toilet paper
Lol did you?
No. But Ruben's bro is bringing some
Lol
Been feeling it for about an hour. 'hey, did you know if you can't feel your nose, you're drunk?'
We has smokies. I had two
Ruben's brother is trying to get punched and Ruben already called it a night.
Sleep time
Ruben's brother slept in his car with the door open for most of the night. Puked in our campsite. Fucker.
Are you having a good time?
Yah, just have to get used to how fast Ruben's bro gets tanked.
Lol. Is he a cheap drunk?
No, just chugs vodka. I don't think he's a cheap drunk, he just doesn't pace himself.
Lol!! Omg hahahahaha
I wish your phone wasn't broken lol
I know. Pics would be sweet.
I took a pic with Ruben's phone last night. Of him next to a chic I got to flash for the photo
Flash? Lol you showed your weiner?
She flashed her boobies
Hahahahahaha!!!! Really!!!!
Omg I love you
I am pretty awesome
Nothing to do. Started drinking 30 minutes ago (10:00 am)
Omg lol
At least my shakes are gone now
Ew lol
Glad we have TP. Could have been an interesting morning.
Oh god lol
It's noon. Does that mean I can start drinking for realz, instead of this one drink per half hour bullshit??
There are at least 3 socks in this toilet that I'm currently peeing in/on
Eew lol they didn't have TP
If you sat on this toilet, your cooch would touch TP
And socks
I JUST GAGGED
That's gross
There's dirt in the bottom of my cup. I'm surprisingly okay with it.
I just passed out in my car for like 40 min. I'm going to piss and do it again (so tired)
Ooooh, boo.
I stole SPF 100 from the neighbors
It's 4:30, bitch. Time for this guy to get drunk
No more 'too sober for this shit' nights for me
Hahahahaha
I've been drinking for 7 hours (5:00 pm)
I just got a hand job from three girls at the same time.
Crazy works for me
Wish I could send you a pic. Ruben and his bro are passed out on lawn chairs.
Hahahahahah!!! Me too
Did I ever tell you?
What?
How awesome I am?
Ruben and I are bringing ppl back to our campsite
You should have brough beersbee
Ruben's out of control
I smell weed
No one will go to the party tent with me. They all want to wait for Ruben. Stupid fucks
I'm standing here telling them he's not coming back. Because I know him
It's not sinking in. Even with his brother
I want to get knifey
All I know is that Ruben is out there somewhere (or more likely in his bed) and I've fingered vagina
Shaved vagina. Vagina I intend to puns to shut
Fuckin ADD
Smoked a bong, fingered a chic
Got a BJ behind pizza 73
Sleep time
Lol!!!!! Gooooood morning hahahaha
I have a bruise on my left leg the size of a plate
Wtf why?
No idea
Everything is dirty. I would not be surprised if that chic gets a UTI
Oh god lol
Ruben woke up under someone's truck last night. And he'd pissed himself
He was so out of control last night
So how's pissy pants?
He apparently wiped himself down before crawling into his tent. So he was probably naked in our camp site at 4 am. Whatever.
Are you drunk?
Right now? I started drinking 45 minutes ago (1:45 pm)
How's your shits?
Fine. Surprisingly
I've been avoiding food
Kind of in general
Why?
Because I don't want to have to shit in the middle of the night
It sucks enough during the day
Still raining. I want to be finished my second 26 by 9:00. I have about 2/3 left.
Omg lol!
Scratch that. Half left.
I've gone through 6 litres of diet coke.
How much do you have left?
No diet coke met. In dreaming cri. The neighbors. Ke
What?
...
No diet coke left
I'm stealing from the neighbors
Oh lol
Yah buddy
Buck cherry is terrible live. I don't think they hit a single note
Finished your booze?
Not yet. I got another 2 oz
I just passed out for two hours
Oh god lol
So I'm right on track
In case you were wondering
I'm very drunk
I still have $ in my pocket. So I'm switching to beer
After 9:00. Mission accomplished.
I'm drunk I keep vomit burping
Not vomiting. But my burps taste like it
Eww
Birthday girl just showed me her tits
:)
And I told her to come hither and she did
Twas awesome
Just threw up in my mouth. That was fun
Try not to throw up on a girl...
It's still light out. We had fireworks. They were awesome
Hammered
Smoked laced cigarette. In a good mood
Still close to vomiting.
Last show of the weekend
:)
I was high ax a kite earlier. Watched the lights for like 20 min.
'call it whatchya wanna call it, I'm a fuckin alcoholic' - avicii
The ground is wet with puke and spilled beer. It's hard to walk around without slipping
Fuck. I have to shit
I saw a guy with bare feet. I'm glad I didn't wear my sandals
The avicii show is so ridiculously good. And I'm not even high anymore
I still need to shit
Guy who served me taco in a bag was Willie Nelson. Swear to god
I swear the thing gets better every time.
Here's a small selection of my text messages from the weekend:
Me: I'm at BOOOOOOOONSTOOOOOOOCK!!!!!!!
Cousin: :D how much beer?
I bought 2 26s of rum
Hahahahaah oh yeah
Yah buddy
I'm having sex tonight
:) I will probably not be. Considering the amount of rum I'll be consuming
Hahahaha, who'd Ruben bring?
His brother.
My shirts dirty.
I might have to share my tent with Ruben's brother
Not looking forward to that.
What??? Why?
He doesn't have his own tent. Fucker.
BYOTP
Bring your own toilet paper
Lol did you?
No. But Ruben's bro is bringing some
Lol
Been feeling it for about an hour. 'hey, did you know if you can't feel your nose, you're drunk?'
We has smokies. I had two
Ruben's brother is trying to get punched and Ruben already called it a night.
Sleep time
Ruben's brother slept in his car with the door open for most of the night. Puked in our campsite. Fucker.
Are you having a good time?
Yah, just have to get used to how fast Ruben's bro gets tanked.
Lol. Is he a cheap drunk?
No, just chugs vodka. I don't think he's a cheap drunk, he just doesn't pace himself.
Lol!! Omg hahahahaha
I wish your phone wasn't broken lol
I know. Pics would be sweet.
I took a pic with Ruben's phone last night. Of him next to a chic I got to flash for the photo
Flash? Lol you showed your weiner?
She flashed her boobies
Hahahahahaha!!!! Really!!!!
Omg I love you
I am pretty awesome
Nothing to do. Started drinking 30 minutes ago (10:00 am)
Omg lol
At least my shakes are gone now
Ew lol
Glad we have TP. Could have been an interesting morning.
Oh god lol
It's noon. Does that mean I can start drinking for realz, instead of this one drink per half hour bullshit??
There are at least 3 socks in this toilet that I'm currently peeing in/on
Eew lol they didn't have TP
If you sat on this toilet, your cooch would touch TP
And socks
I JUST GAGGED
That's gross
There's dirt in the bottom of my cup. I'm surprisingly okay with it.
I just passed out in my car for like 40 min. I'm going to piss and do it again (so tired)
Ooooh, boo.
I stole SPF 100 from the neighbors
It's 4:30, bitch. Time for this guy to get drunk
No more 'too sober for this shit' nights for me
Hahahahaha
I've been drinking for 7 hours (5:00 pm)
I just got a hand job from three girls at the same time.
Crazy works for me
Wish I could send you a pic. Ruben and his bro are passed out on lawn chairs.
Hahahahahah!!! Me too
Did I ever tell you?
What?
How awesome I am?
Ruben and I are bringing ppl back to our campsite
You should have brough beersbee
Ruben's out of control
I smell weed
No one will go to the party tent with me. They all want to wait for Ruben. Stupid fucks
I'm standing here telling them he's not coming back. Because I know him
It's not sinking in. Even with his brother
I want to get knifey
All I know is that Ruben is out there somewhere (or more likely in his bed) and I've fingered vagina
Shaved vagina. Vagina I intend to puns to shut
Fuckin ADD
Smoked a bong, fingered a chic
Got a BJ behind pizza 73
Sleep time
Lol!!!!! Gooooood morning hahahaha
I have a bruise on my left leg the size of a plate
Wtf why?
No idea
Everything is dirty. I would not be surprised if that chic gets a UTI
Oh god lol
Ruben woke up under someone's truck last night. And he'd pissed himself
He was so out of control last night
So how's pissy pants?
He apparently wiped himself down before crawling into his tent. So he was probably naked in our camp site at 4 am. Whatever.
Are you drunk?
Right now? I started drinking 45 minutes ago (1:45 pm)
How's your shits?
Fine. Surprisingly
I've been avoiding food
Kind of in general
Why?
Because I don't want to have to shit in the middle of the night
It sucks enough during the day
Still raining. I want to be finished my second 26 by 9:00. I have about 2/3 left.
Omg lol!
Scratch that. Half left.
I've gone through 6 litres of diet coke.
How much do you have left?
No diet coke met. In dreaming cri. The neighbors. Ke
What?
...
No diet coke left
I'm stealing from the neighbors
Oh lol
Yah buddy
Buck cherry is terrible live. I don't think they hit a single note
Finished your booze?
Not yet. I got another 2 oz
I just passed out for two hours
Oh god lol
So I'm right on track
In case you were wondering
I'm very drunk
I still have $ in my pocket. So I'm switching to beer
After 9:00. Mission accomplished.
I'm drunk I keep vomit burping
Not vomiting. But my burps taste like it
Eww
Birthday girl just showed me her tits
:)
And I told her to come hither and she did
Twas awesome
Just threw up in my mouth. That was fun
Try not to throw up on a girl...
It's still light out. We had fireworks. They were awesome
Hammered
Smoked laced cigarette. In a good mood
Still close to vomiting.
Last show of the weekend
:)
I was high ax a kite earlier. Watched the lights for like 20 min.
'call it whatchya wanna call it, I'm a fuckin alcoholic' - avicii
The ground is wet with puke and spilled beer. It's hard to walk around without slipping
Fuck. I have to shit
I saw a guy with bare feet. I'm glad I didn't wear my sandals
The avicii show is so ridiculously good. And I'm not even high anymore
I still need to shit
Guy who served me taco in a bag was Willie Nelson. Swear to god
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